But God I Don’t Wanna Love

But God I don’t wanna love. Ever been there? He hurt me. She hurt me. I didn’t get what I want. I was taken advantage of. Look what they did to me. C’mon God, surely I don’t need to love that person. Right? But God – I was there again this morning. How could that person do this? What about me? Me, me, me. Imagine if God said that about us. Imagine if God stopped loving us because of the mistakes we keep on making. Imagine if God stopped loving us because of all we have done wrong. Imagine if Jesus Christ had not gone to the cross because He didn’t get what He wanted, because the world was too broken, because our sins were too grievous. Just imagine. Now imagine if we all stopped loving. If the truth be told, much of the world isn’t doing such a good job of loving, is it? But the world isn’t just them. The world is also us – including me, me, me. How good a job are we doing in loving others? Is our love conditional? But God –

It amazes me that we can do a whole bunch “right” in our actions and yet miss the most important ingredient. Love.  In my case, I haven’t been doing too great a job at either. But thanks be to God, He loves me so much that He shows me this when I fall short. And He has. And He is. His love is not conditional for me, nor should my love be conditional when it comes to the world around me. But here precisely is the problem. His love. My love. My human love is conditional. My love will fall short. My love will fail. But His never does. And because I place my faith in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, His love is in me that I might love the world around me with His unconditional love. The trouble comes when I rely on my human flesh to try to love rather than rely on His love as the supply of love with which I need to love others. It’s like putting the wrong kind of gas in my gas tank. It doesn’t work. At the very most, I can love in a limited way. But God doesn’t want me to love with limits. He wants me to love unleashed. Unlimited. Unhindered. Unrestrained. He wants me to love on fire.

So what did I do this morning regarding the person who had upset me? I took my emotions to the Lord, and I took His love to that person. I reached out to the person in love, and I prayed for that person also. I didn’t get what I wanted from the person, but I get everything I need from the Lord. The world isn’t my supply station. And when I think it is, and turn to the world for what I need or desire, I will always come away disappointed and let down – and not in the mood or shape or strength to love the way I am called. The best thing I can do is get filled up with God and then rely on His supply of love and other provision to help a hurting world. After all, our world today isn’t in the best shape – to say the least. A little love goes a long way, perhaps longer than ever. What our world needs most is Jesus Christ and His love. And His love ges on forever. Why not do my part?

Instead of saying, “But God, I don’t wanna love”, I can say, “God, help me to love.” And He will. He always does. After all, He is love. And He is the one this world needs. His love never fails.

Father, in Jesus name, I ask that you forgive me all my sins and cleanse me completely. I have fallen more short than imaginable, and yet I know your mercy never runs out. I only need to come to you in confession and with Godly sorrow, which I do now. Lord, my human love will never be enough. And your love, my Lord, is always enough. Please Father, have mercy on this world, and have mercy on me. Lord, I have felt far away from you. Yet it is my doing, not yours. Lord, I have felt such horrible attack from Satan. Yet you told me you have allowed it because you want to show me how strong I am IN you. But there is no strength in disobedience, no strength in rebellion, no strength in sin that is not confessed. Lord, this morning I cried like a baby because it seems like I have not gotten what I have wanted in so very long – and have lost so much of what I did want and felt I needed. But I confess, Lord, you know what is best for me. And I make a decision now to place my trust in you. I have no right to withdraw my love from you, my neighbor, or my dogs because I am stressed out, overwhelmed, confused, broken, have not gotten what I wanted, or anything at all. What a baby I have been! And look at you, Lord. Still, you have not withdrawn your love from me. Lord, I receive your forgiveness now for all of this, for not loving people and the doggies the way you have called me to, and I forgive myself. I ask you now, Lord, to please fill me anew with your Holy Spirit and to help me to go out into this day, into this world, with your love shining and overflowing through me to touch the world around me. I love you Lord. Thank you! In Jesus name. Amen! 



1Jn 4:15  “Whosoever shall confess that Jesus is the Son of God, God dwelleth in him, and he in God. 
1Jn 4:16  And we have known and believed the love that God hath to us. God is love; and he that dwelleth in love dwelleth in God, and God in him.”

Rom 5:3  “And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing that tribulation worketh patience; 
Rom 5:4  And patience, experience; and experience, hope: 
Rom 5:5  And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.”

1Co 13:1  “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. 
1Co 13:2  And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. 
1Co 13:3  And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing. 
1Co 13:4  Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up, 
1Co 13:5  Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil; 
1Co 13:6  Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth; 
1Co 13:7  Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things. 
1Co 13:8  Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. 
1Co 13:9  For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. 
1Co 13:10  But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. 
1Co 13:11  When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. 
1Co 13:12  For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. 
1Co 13:13  And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.”

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