I Can’t Do This!
“I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” Phil. 4:13
I was having one of those days. You know the kind. We all have them. I rushed around caring for the dogs to get ready for a doctor’s appointment. Finally ready. Appointment canceled. Ugh. The lab couldn’t find the bloodwork the nurse had drawn so the doctor could go over the results with me. So I shifted gears. I would stay home and work. I called to reschedule. The nurse told me to come in and get my blood drawn again. Argh. Shifted gears again. So much for my work. I would take some with me. I had been editing my Gospel tracts and devotionals and seeking the Lord about whether He wanted me to take any out of print, simply make edits, or leave them as they were. I was totally confused when I printed out copies to edit. Which were which? The old? The new? Somewhere in between? Frustrated – again. Auggggh. Harrumph.
“I can’t do this!” I declared aloud frustratingly as I headed for the trash to throw them all away in a little fit of fluster. Okay, anger to be precise.
“Yes you can.” The words were soft. Kind. Tender. Firm. God’s Spirit.
Argh again. Of course I can. Through Christ. I had been trying for some days to get this all figured out – along with lots of other projects and extremely limited help, human help that is.
“I don’t know where to begin!” I huffed after I’d thrown everything away. No sense trying to figure it out. I would have to start from scratch.
“Begin with me.” The words came clearly. Not aloud. Loud in my heart. Emphatically. God’s Spirit – again. Making sure I heard. That I got it.
“Oh, of course!” I sighed. And there it was.
Why do so many of us make God our last resort when He needs to be our first resort? Why do we call Jesus Lord and act like He’s not? Why do we know God is sovereign yet convince ourselves we are or need to be? Why do we scramble around seeking answers without seeking Him? Why do we pray to Him for some stuff and not for the rest? Why do we look to ourselves and the world instead of to Him? Why do some of us know better but we still do this anyway?
God has called me as an evangelist and author and to write, publish, and distribute books, Gospel tracts, and devotionals. Who am I to think He will not lead me, guide me, help me, enable me, provide for me, and strengthen me, equip me to fulfill what He has called me to do? Of course He will. He has – and will continue to. I simply need to trust, seek, and follow Jesus.
Walking with the Lord day by day isn’t about walking by ourselves. It’s about walking with God, yielding ourselves to Him as His Spirit through His Word leads us along the winding pathways of our lives, conforming us to Christ as He teaches us to walk in His ways.