My Hurt, My Peace, My King

I am at peace inside even though my heart hurts. It hurts for those who have betrayed me, rejected me, abandoned me, abused me, neglected me, lashed out at me, turned their backs on me, rebuked me, and hated me. Oh, how my heart hurts!

But alas, I have a peace that nothing and nobody can touch. This peace is mine forever because the Maker of my peace lies inside me and has promised me eternity in a place where tears and broken hearts will be no more. And there I will rest in His loving embrace where I shall sing the sigh that rests so deep in my soul.

My sigh, my relief in the midst of all of this grief over what humans have done that upon His throne in heaven sits the One who holds my heart forever. I exhale my heart into His hands and unwind, unfold, uncurl my troubled soul into His never-ending oh so sweet bath of mercy.

He restores my soul once more and showers down His longing that I would once more remember the wilderness He carried me through to arrive at the feet of my King. Bowed down in never humble enough adoration before the Almighty.

How tender are your ways, oh Lord. How Kind you are to me. I, who have hurt others just as others have hurt me. Perhaps the only difference being I know that in my godly sorrow, in my once more confession, in my tenacious repentance, I receive your reign.

Oh Lord, many are the ways they have come against me. Many are the ways they still do. But hidden in my beloved Jesus, I am replenished with your wellspring of love and kindness – that pours into me and through me to the world around me.

Oh, if grace were not enough what would I do? But it always is, sending floods of your Holy Spirit to all the hearts that know you not. The hurt has gone away now, if but for a season, in remembering your love for me as it gushes in me on its way through me to water the dying world around.

I rest in you.

Father God, help your hurting children. Bring comfort. Bring a revelation of your love for your Creation. Bring your peace. Pour out your mercy. Oh Lord! 

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