Alcohol. Anorexia. Men. The past. New York City. Food. Dogs. New Age. Eastern religion. Writing. Oh, the list goes on and on. Not only were countless people, places, and things part of my life, but I had made them “my life.” I lived for them, and I believed somehow I could live through them, because of them, by them, etc. And, tragically, there were numerous times I believed I could not live without them. My identity, my needs, my wants, my desires, my dreams, my agenda, my plan, my purpose, my focus (I still struggle with this one!), my hope, my “peace” (not that I ever truly knew peace), and so much more rested in the world around me. I lived and breathed for a man, I contemplated suicide over a lost relationship, I became hospitalized because of an eating disorder, and so on. My life? The world.
Today, after a long journey to get here, I can say without hesitation that my number one love is the Lord. My number one passion is Him. My number one desire is to love and serve Him with all of me. My number one dream is to live His dreams for my life. My hope? Him. My peace. Him. My life. Him.
Do I still struggle? Yes. Do I still fall? All the time. But the life force in me now is the Lord. He lives inside me. He gave me life. He gives me life. He sustains my life. And He is the reason I live. In fact, He lives inside of me. His life in mine. His life through mine. My life for Him. His will be done.
I ENCOURAGE YOU to ask yourself this question. What is your life? I encourage you to pray about the answer. And I encourage you to decide whether it might be time to make a change. Is the Lord your life?
Gal_2:20 KJV “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”
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