Crying God’s Tears

Sometimes I feel like I am crying God’s tears. I look out upon a broken world and my heart cries. If it rained forever how could it be enough to show forth the tears from God’s eyes for all the pain and hurt and wounds and tragedies of God’s Creation? But the sky does not need to cry rain for me to imagine all God’s mourning for what we have done with all that He has given us. I cannot imagine. I do not try. I just cry inside, and sometimes my own face rains tears that maybe mirror His heart.

Mustn’t He grieve at the state of all that He put His heart and hand to, of what remains now of all that He gave and gives that we might be through Christ’s cross once again like they lived in the Garden – reconciled to a holy God so holy how can we in our broken ways as hard clay in His healing hands fathom His wailing at what we have turned all of His majesty into? Does He wail? I do in my spirit; I wail as I see, and know, and cannot comprehend, how can we turn our backs so easily on Him?

Him who surrendered His only Son to live as man as we do, to climb up on that old rugged cross, to die a death we will never fully know the heights and depths of. For how can we know the widths and lengths of what our Father did, and His Son, when if only we would truly believe the love He has for us – us, the broken. Us, the lost. Us, the desperately pleading.

Answer our prayers. Answer our prayers. But what do we do beyond pray? Even those of us who believe, what do we do? Do we follow? Do we lay down our lives – our dreams and desires – for others the way He taught us? Do we cry for the hurting? Mourn with the mourning? Break with the breaking? Does our flesh sear in the fire of our resolve to love our neighbors? Love one another? Do we? Do we cry God’s tears?

Oh, my heart grieves for the hurting. Sometimes God wakes me from my sleep not only to pray. But to hurt for the hurting. To grieve for the grieving. To mourn for the mourning.

And, maybe most of all, to cry for God. For how can He the holy one after all that He has done for us, after all He still does, with all He will do in His plan of redemption – how can He still love us when we hardly give Him a passing thought? When we say we love Him but refuse to obey? When we live our lives for ourselves and neglect His ways? When we refuse to cry with broken hearts for how we must hurt our God.

Is it not enough that we have rejected Him? Is it not enough that we now refuse to repent? When will it be enough? Perhaps when it is too late. Perhaps when we take our last breath and have lost our opportunity to turn to Him in repentance and to live the lives He has called us to live.

Oh, how my heart hurts. Even when the ones I love who profess to love Him refuse to give Him much more than the time of day – if even that.

And then, again, I look out at a world that cries. We cry for ourselves. Sometimes, we cry for each other. And, I wonder. If only the world that cries in its pain would cry out to the Lord – in godly sorry and true repentance. For our unholy lives. For what we have done with what He has given us. What He has offered us. What we have refused. His Son. Who paid the price for us all.

Forgive us, Father. For we have sinned. Help us Lord! Help our unbelief. Forgive our wicked ways.

Oh, God, most of the world it seems cries out but not for you. So I cry, Lord, for the world. And, I plead with you. Have mercy, my Lord. Forgive us all. For we have fallen so far short of your glory. Help us believe. Heal our land. Forgive the mess we have made. Forgive us for above all else not bowing down to you. Forgive us for worshiping the things and the ways of this world. Forgive us for worshiping ourselves. Forgive us for worshiping everything and everyone other than you. Forgive us for saying we love you and never showing you love by our actions. Have mercy upon us all. We do not deserve you, Lord, but we need you. And I plead on behalf of myself, this nation, and this world. Help us to believe, Lord! Help us to live the lives you have called us to live. Oh God! Help us.

Reign, Lord. Bring forth your reign. The rain is not enough to describe all the tears you must cry at what we have done.

So reign, oh Lord.

In Jesus’ name. 

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